John Mayer is a bit of a guilty pleasure. Although a mature 32, this man-child is known for his weird Twitter ramblings and inane magazine interviews. I sort of take everything he says like he’s just fucking with the interviewer to see what kind of while, stupid shit they’ll put in print.
Rolling Stone took the bait during a recent interview, in which the singer-songwriter admitted to being a compulsive jerk off.
“I am the new generation of masturbator,” John Mayer says. “I’ve seen it all. Before I make coffee, I’ve seen more butt holes than a proctologist does in a week. I mean, I have masturbated myself out of serious problems in my life. The phone doesn’t pick up because I’m masturbating. And I have excused myself at the oddest times so as to not make mistakes. If Tiger Woods only knew when to jerk off. It has a true market value, like gold bullion. First of all, I don’t jerk off because I’m horny … No, I do it because I want to take a brain bath. It’s like a hot whirlpool for my brain, in a brain space that is 100 percent agreeable with itself.”
Obviously your wank schedule shouldn’t get in the way of daily activities. Otherwise, pants off! Exploring our bodies is healthy, natural and fun. Fact.