I know, everybody hates VD. People loathe the most romantic holiday of the year! Which is weird, because people generally seem to like Christmas yet that holiday has the highest suicide rate. You’d think it would be Valentine’s Day. I’m not trying to give you ideas.
Just kidding. I’m totally going to give you ideas. That’s my whole thing. Let’s think about this year differently, shall we? Maybe you don’t have a significant other — so what? That’s a hell of a lot better than having someone who isn’t very significant. I really think unhealthy relationships are way sadder than being single.
Whitney Houston (God rest her soul) said it best: “I’d rather be alone than unhappy.” That’s right, diva.
How about this: Let’s all try to love each other a little more today. Errybody your Valentine! Remember, like in school, were you passed out shit your mom made you buy to people you didn’t like? Except now you’re grown and have Facebook friends. Poke them or something.
Or better yet, write one really decent email (over 5 lines) to a good friend telling them why they’re so close to your heart. Just don’t make it weird. It could confuse them.
What I’m saying is to stop feeling sorry for yourself, bitches. Turn it around. Spread a little love.
Happy Valentine’s Day, ya’ll!